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I am diagnosed with fistula

I have two boils at my left bum. It starts from a single boil. I didn't have much pain. I thought it to be a small thing as a simple pus collected thing. But after 1 year the second boil appeared near to the first one. I went to surgeon and he told me that I have fistula and it needs surgery. But he also told me that surgery involves risk of incontinence and also recurrence may happen as my fistula has gone inside my circular muscles around my rectum. Its been two years and I am still having discharge but I do not feel any pain. I am only 28 years old and do not want to go for surgery. I am even avoiding my marriage because of this problem. Can anyone tell me what to do?

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